April 1998 – email14

   From: Gary Ploski
  4/24/98 23:23
Subject: Re: yo -Reply

        Thanks for the reply. I did go through the Who, what, why, etc stage. It lasted for the duration of the madness while she was in FL. I woke up after it had all been completed (decided that we would be able to see other people) and looked around my apartment and couldn’t believe what I had been doing to MYSELF. I was fucking myself up in a big way. Angry and cold, etc! BUT that morning, I made a change. I’m not kidding!

        I thought to myself as I cleaned my apartment – ‘this is stupid! Why are you doing this to yourself? You’ve been on your own for so long and now you’re doing this to yourself over a girl?! Get on with it and move on self! Go with it and live like you’ve lived before.’ WIth that, I was a changed person. Yes I still have thoughts about her. ANd yes I still have thoughts about ‘getting back’ at her, but then I tell myself. Life is 99% what you make of it, so if you’re life sucks, you suck.

        After I think that… I feel really good about myself. I’m not going out with that girl(Hisae) anymore for the reason that she had to return to TPU to finish an Incomplete class before the end of APril. I had a great time with her while she was here and was enraptured by the 3 kisses we had. THey were absolutely incredible. Each was a simple kiss. Nothing more than lip to lips, but damn they were awesome. I don’t think I would ever have expected that type of thing to happen. I’d proably laugh if someone told me that without having experienced it personally. D it was incredible.

        Anyway, good luck with your hanging out and stuff with this girl. Did you tell me her name… I don’t remember. I only remember her last name.  I do like the title for the article. THat’s one damned nice title if I say so myself, and I do say so myself. D keep with it and believe me — THat’s exactly what I’m doing over here! I’ve been havin soooo much fun after I slapped myself adn awoke from the depressed state I was in when all the crap was going on. We get through it, we always will. It’s the way life works. Have a crazy day d-nice. ciao cito

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