May 2001 – 05/22/2001

Silence . I really enjoy silence. Every now and then I turn off the radio and CD player and listen. I listen to the sound of the wind, the bumps on the ground, the sound of the engine. Oddly enough, the sound of the wind in my ears as I fell to the Earth comes to mind. = )

Friends are over at the moment. We just make a trek through the "Rainforest Cafe" and now we play! Game on! —————————————————————————————————— car!

Now I sit in my own silence. A stillness that’s welcoming and comforting. Silence of the mind, no not yet. I doubt that will happen anytime soon. Oh whoa is me. Oh such… to use a great friends’ term ‘drama’. I feel that some iolationism, even if for only a few moments in my life/day, is going to help me get through my present situations – emotionally and physcially. I’m not dying or anything you greedy bastards. I’m just coping with things that I am, ha!, fortunate enough to have to ‘deal with’.

Yes I laughed at that. Think about this if you will… You are sitting at home/work/stuck on a train/browsing the web — THE WEB. The world wide web! You have access to information about ANYTHING! Let me say that again… ANYTHING! With that I can pretty much guess that you are able to read… you’re reading this aint ya. You’re breathing – double double bonus bonus. How much better can this get?!

Really? Okay so you didn’t get the grade you expected on ‘that’ test. Yea yea yea, you’re stuck in traffic again. Whop-di-doo. You and I are damn lucky to be able to have the chance to complain about this stuff. I’ve been beating myself up recently over somethings and wondering "What am I gonna do?! Ohhhh man!!!!" I think I know now. I’m going to take it as it comes and accept what is presented to me… I’m refering to the emotional stuff right now. I’ll make my way forward with my career – that just needs time.

As this book carries on tonight. I’m feeling much, MUCH better than last night. Thank you time! There is a certain someone that doesn’t like what I call them here in this journal. I’m sorry you don’t like your reference name, but that aninimity thing is kind of important to me regarding other people. You know how I feel. This has not changed. You know what I said and you know what that means. *S* <- meaning -> out

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