Melting Energy

The other day night (7/8) I wrote the following on my way back from the city:

The past two days I have felt disconnected to my work. I have been in the office. Nope. I’m not on vacation. Yes, there are stimulating topics in discussion among my colleagues. Something else seems to be lacking. I dare say it is direction.

The school is presently undergoing a refocusing of sorts and this has led me to wonder what my role is. I know what I do and I continue to find new ideas and options around corners but are these the right things into which I should be investing my time?

Right now I believe the answer is yes. The present needs of the institution are being met but, again, is this right/appropriate? To that end I cannot answer so resolutely.

A new agenda is in motion that may bring about healthier working relationships between staff and faculty. But the motion has been caused by a pebble. … Hmm. I guess I’m not leaning toward the hopeful side of the coin. Maybe tomorrow will be better. The past two days have been rough at work. Maybe tomorrow will be better. Maybe.

Update: This (Thursday) morning I woke up to 66. Degrees that is. The fan was spinning and I actually felt chilly. It was such a refreshing feeling. Walking to work, talking to coworkers outside, and even at work inside I felt like a human. Was it the weather that was weighing me down? Had that been causing grief and frustrations? Not all of it, but it played a considerable role. Nearly everyone I spoke to during the day commented on how great it was outside and how nice it felt.

Argh. The weather. One of the worst topics in the world to talk about or write about but after 3 miserable days of thunderstorm forcasted, high humidity, high temperature days I wasn’t the only one that felt real again. Sweet!

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